Lately I’ve been doing these long, full body stretches that eventually do something bad to one of my muscles, making it feel as if it’s going to pop out of my flesh. Presently I’m rubbing on the side of my neck, which I have just finished stretching to the point of giving me serious owies.
Things have been surreal lately. This past weekend I had a really good time, and felt almost guilty for reliving my teenage years. Friday night I went to friend Claudia’s house and played drunken Uno. I mixed myself some Gin and tonics, damn it had been a long time since I’d had one of those.
Saturday I went to orientation at my new job (at our favorite french boutique) and started the day off productively. Afterwards I took a small nap (I was sleepy!) and played some Silent Hill 2. I called and he came right over. We went to the Junction for fries and a cinnamon roll, and then saw Napoleon Dynamite. It was funny as hell. I enjoyed it, and even though my mind occasionally drifted to the pretentiousness of independent film makers, overall I give the movie a thumbs up.
Next we got some drinks and went to a show. ‘s boyfriend was in one of the bands, and therefore we knew some folks there. It was great. I remember thinking, at one point, that it was the best day I had ever had. Everything, from starting a new job to hanging out in a dark smoke-filled room with a bunch of alternakids and punkers, was just peachy. I even got some Absolut for and myself and we made screwdrivers while huddling among the bouncing music lovers. drove, so I didn’t have to worry about that -and I was feelin’ pretty good by the time we left. Time is not my friend, however, and when we finally settled in to watch a movie with Deeto, both and myself were nodding off intermittently. He saved the day by announcing he was leaving, and gave me a ride home.
I actually had fun this weekend, and I really allowed myself to enjoy it. It was time that I deserved, and it almost makes me feel rejuvenated. Today in the mail I got yet another notice to withold income/medical support from Chris’s new employer. Apparently Bastian’s father has yet another job. I was half tempted to call the AVRS (Automated Voice Response System) customer service number for the Illinios Department of Public Aid and ask them, “How come I get these notices once or twice every year and never, EVER, see a check as a result?”. I didn’t.
I know that if I call I’ll be put on hold for around 45 minutes and then get some pissed off, over worked, state employee who’ll tell me (in a roundabout way) that things just are that way, and to hunt him down myself if I want any money.
So that was kind of a downer, but whatever. We’re making it anyway -I just have to continually deny myself the dangerous pleasure of imagining a world where I get that $60 a week from Chris that could go towards groceries, diapers, or clothes. If I never think about it, I don’t feel quite so despondent about our financial situation. I’m not a big fan of the victim mentality anyway.